I was scared to be the CEO of Yoast. I am scared to speak my mind on Twitter. I am terrified at the launch of any new product. I am still scared to present on stage. I am even scared to ask a question at a conference.
I am always scared to step out of my comfort zone. And I often feel like a fraud. I was convinced I failed the theoretic part of my driver’s exam, while, as it turned out, I made 0 mistakes. During the public defense of my Ph.D., I was sure that one of the professors would laugh and point out that I was not qualified and that my dissertation was not good enough. Even though I already had several scientific publications and won awards. What is this overwhelming belief that I have failed or will fail?
Hello! It’s me! It’s your imposter syndrome! The imposter syndrome is a strong feeling of self-doubt and impotence, although your experiences, education, and accomplishments prove otherwise. You are rocking and flourishing, and all the while, you only feel like a failure. How weird is that?
I’ve often told myself that I’m done impostering. I am too old for this shit, right? It doesn’t work that way, but I have been getting better. As with all forms of anxiety – whether you’re scared of spiders, small rooms, or leadership roles – the more you are exposed to the thing you fear, the less scared you’ll be.
If you experience imposter syndrome, too, be kind to yourself. Don’t judge yourself because you feel nervous or restless. Don’t judge yourself because you think you ‘are too old for this shit’. Give yourself a break. And don’t give up. Try things that are just outside your comfort zone. You don’t need to become the next CEO of Microsoft all at once. Try to step into a slightly bigger role or a slightly more challenging position. Taking small steps, and trying out new things, will eventually get you where you belong!
Joost and Marieke will be on spring break for the next two weeks, so the next column will appear May 15th, 2024.
